This week was our work Christmas party, but on the day I was feeling more Grinch than Santa’s Little Helper.

I was tired, the weather was awful, I was travelling to the venue from home, on my own. I had a looming client deadline and an important team mate who had to take sick leave.

As I plodded up from the station towards the brightly lit entrance, head bowed against the wind and rain, I contemplated how long I would have to stay before I could escape back home. Luckily, I have been part of a course called Upfront for the past month, and reminded myself that if I felt this way, chances are that other people coming that evening felt the same reluctance to show up on their own, not sure who they would know and unaccustomed to socialising with colleagues.

So I decided to take inspiration from this excellent TED talk by Deborah Frances-White and decide: how did I want to change the room? How did I want people to feel after speaking to me that evening?

As I entered the room, a series of heads swivelled to see who the latest arrival was. With most of the room’s eyes on me, I spread my arms out wide, smiled and said “Wow, this is quite the welcome committee!”. And just like that, I got started.